by running from it until it finds me in the middle of a sunny street on a beautiful day
prev had extremely beautiful and profound thoughts i had to share
You deal with grief in layers and an upwards spiral, always navigating closer and further away from the pain, getting used to the box full of memories, but still tearing up at your song. Being able to sing the song two months later, but breaking down on the street their house is on. Feeling a pang at seeing their sweater still in your drawer while getting dressed for a date with someone new. Yesterday I was on his street and got home and sobbed in a pile at my mother’s feet. Today I walked the same street and smiled. Tomorrow, I may cry again. But always, always, I spiral up.
I won’t take credit for the analogy, but there’s a hospice nurse named Hadley Vlahos who posts on other platforms and wrote a book on death and grief. Her metaphor for it is so brilliant to explain it to any age group.
Picture your life as a box, there’s a big red button at the bottom of the box and when something presses it, you feel pain. When someone dies, your grief is a bouncy ball in the box, and when it first happens, the bouncy ball takes up the entire box, it constantly triggers that pain button. But as you grow older and time passes, the box gets bigger but the ball stays the same, bouncing around inside the box forever. It never leaves the box, but as the box gets bigger, the ball doesn’t trigger the pain button as often. It still happens, out of the blue, and it’ll hurt the same way it did day one, but eventually days, weeks, months go by between the ball hitting the button and you learn to live your life between triggers.
My friend just spotted Matthew out in the wild still dressed like an absolute disaster and it’s too good to keep to myself.
Edit: I should add this was taken before 7 pm like this was EARLY mess.
I just saw in your tags that you hoped this was taken with his consent, I know that was forever ago, but I just wanted to add that my friend’s husband is in the original photo, I’ve cropped him out of it before posting it here, but yes he knew the selfie was being taken and was cool with it.
You know what, doesn’t matter how long ago that is, thank you for confirming! Even when he’s being kind of a little shit, I don’t think anyone deserves to look that blasted in a picture they don’t know about. Thank you for coming back to tell me!
[image is a digital illustration of a floating unicorn whose coat is vertically bisected into speckled black on one side and ghostly white on the other. in the background, a stylized cresent moon glows in a teal-toned night sky.]
I love how you can put literally anything in the tags except for commas. You can have whole-ass ideas and thoughts and messages in there… Just not structured and coherent ones.
WHO will download costar onto hockey players’ phones so they get just the most batshit notifications to send them into a tailspin at like 12:30 in the afternoon
insane message to face before lunch. I want to subject connor mcdavid to it
what is this one even supposed to mean?
editing it and blasting it across the nhlpa for an extra sprinkle of drama this offseason
